Thanks for joining us tonight for our first Tuesday Night Football broadcast, a 2 - 2 battle between the Norse and Chaos. Our sponsor for tonight's game between the Bloody Vikings! and the Slaaneshi Libertines is Visit the Great Norde. "Travel to the great white Norde." Also...Nordic Express. "Yes, we do hate Kapital Wan. They're NOT in our wallets!!! Nordic Express. Don't go pillaging without it!"
Hello, BFL fans. This is Bri'k Mouseberg'r. We're talking with Vikings coach Gavlak to get his thoughts on his team's first game against the bruising Slaaneshi Libertines.
BFL: Coach, what did you think about the early part of the game tonight?
Gavlak: At first, I thought that I was going to get butchered, but things went pretty smoothly. The Slaaneshi got to the infamous one foot line until one of my throwers, Bradshaw, pushed him into a section of Norde fans, which beat the crap out of his guy. Haar! Haar! The Libertine eventually scored, but then the following kickoff went out of bounds.
BFL: That must have looked like a great opportunity for the Vikings, right?
Gavlak: My best runner Sven Polamalu got a nice block from Hamm and ran away for a quick score to tie the game. After he quit screaming and beating his chest, I told him to celebrate with a tradtional Nordic leap into the Vikings fan section, making sure he did not get hurt by Nordic fans' warhammers. Unfortunately, we kicked off, and the Libertines made a score just before the first half cannon went off. 2 - 1 Libertines.
BFL: Were you worried to start the half? Chaos was moving the ball well.
Gavlak: Norsemen do not worry. We get angry. We got the ball in the second half and dropped it early deep in our territory. Chaos picked up the ball quickly, but with his one Chaos player against our four and his guys moving slow, we got the ball back quickly and moved it downfield, while distracting his men with pretty blow up dolls of cheerleaders. Beastmen are SO stupid.
Gavlak: Instead of going for a touchdown with my linemen "Lucky" Dreizehn, Dreizehn tried to handoff to Sven Polamalu; he dropped it. Seeing that the jig was up (and gone!) with the distraction, we [Vikings] had to do something. Sven Polamalu threw a hard foul resulting in the Vikings' fifth ejection. OUCH!
BFL: Five ejections!?! That must be a FBL record. The Libertines must have had some home cooking with the refs. What next?
Gavlak: Before Polamalu went out the game, he KILLED(!!!) the player he fouled and threw the corpse to the Bloody Vikings! fans. They feasted on and looted his corpse. Let our opponents' blood stain the stands! Remember, pillaging has no boundaries. We eventually scored to tie the game at 2 - 2, and that was the end result.
BFL: That's amazing. The BFL's first death of the season. Thoughts on the future Coach?
Gavlak: I have a new assistant coach, Bill "the Wise" Cowher and Helga's sexy twin sister, Hilda, as a cheerleader. Don't flirt with Hilda because Helga bashed the one guy that landed on her lap and took his wallet. She found Kapital Wan inside and promptly beat him to death with her mailed breasts. We added his petty cash to our team earnings, 20,000 gold. Haar! It's good to be a Bloody Viking!
BFL: Thanks, Coach, for the recap. This has been Bri'k Mouseberg'r for FBL. See you next week, Bloodlust fans!
